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13 August 2017

alone & unsupervised, Vleeptron Dude sings about el choo-choo tren marihuana por fumar / should I bring chocolates to the pretty young physician's assistant Tuesday?

Click to enlarge / clicko por mas grande

S.W.M.B.O. has left me alone and unsupervised, so this is what all youse Vleeptroids get. Okay I owe you a few True Answers to a couple of PizzaQs. I'll get around to it. I promise.


A very nice pretty young Asian-American physician's assistant stuck her gloved finger up my butt a few weeks ago. Tuesday she's going to do it again! I can't wait! Should I bring her chocolates?

12 August 2017

if you're in USA & you just see this eclipse on TV you are soooooo lame & pathetic / use correct eclipse glasses or you'll go blind / the Sun will go dark, day will turn to night / send me $$$$ or I will not turn the Sun back on

Reputable Vendors of Solar Filters & Viewers

Step 1: Change gender. Step 2: Change faiths. Step 3. Fly to India. Step 4. Start dating local guys.

Click brides to enlarge.

fenil chohan has left a new comment on your post "It's عيد الفطر Eid al-Fitr, and Vleeptron wishes e...":

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Posted by fenil chohan to Vleeptron_Z at Saturday, 12 August, 2017 


ADDENDUM: The middle bride, that's not a tatt on her forearm, it's a design painted in henna.

06 August 2017

Vleeptron Dude loves & recommends all thujone beverages / always have fire extinguisher at Absinthe party

Click to enlarge, hold hand in candle flame, slice off your ear.

THIS is the thujone molecule in 3D. The balls are element atoms; the sticks are electric bonds. You can orient the molecule any way you like with your cursor. The 3D wiggle molecule is from a collection at St. Olaf College in Northfield, Minnesota USA.

Thujone's chemical formula is

so you can figure out which balls are atoms of which element.

Vleeptron dedicates this post to Dr. Archie Lucas, my high school chemistry teacher.

20 July 2017

the old Suisse Tourist who set off the HAZMAT alarms in Honduras / a suvenir Snowglobe from Hell / Death looms for Grampa in the Hot Garage, but he's left his young loved ones all his Nifty Hot Stuff

Click Click Click to enlarge.

Vleeptron awards this medal to every member of the Afficianodos who have visited Chernobyl. (So far nobody's made it to or near Fukushima.) We've sent 2 Intrepid Explorers to get in the Kiev van and a local woman drove them to allowable zones in the Chernobyl complex (until the wearable rad monitors started to click bricks frantically, then Ludmilla pushes you back in the van, We're Out of Here Now).

an e-List e-mail:

Not sure if this is a good place for this discussion. G**, if you disagree, go ahead and delete.

I am going through setting up a will, and such papers and deciding what to do if I become incapacitated or die, so as not to be a burden on my offspring.

(Not that I'm planning to any time soon. . .)

But that brought up what to do with my radioactive collection. I've asked the kids already and none of them are interested. Does anybody have any good ideas about what to do with a bunch of mixed radioactive materials in such a case?

I have a hundred or so radium clock hands, a dozen or so gas mantles, 

[the old Coleman camping lantern mantles were made of  thorium, it's enthusiastically radioactive, makes Geiger-Muller detectors go wild.]

and some pretty hot uraninite crystals, a couple of Fiesta ware plates, and a Fiesta ware salt and pepper shaker set.

The kids seriously don't want them.

I've thought that a couple of days before I die, I should put them in a cardboard box and try to drive into Mexico, but that presumes that I'll be capable of driving and making such decisions at that point. There are lots of ways of dying that preclude that option.

Does anybody have any better ideas?



Hi H*****

I like your phrase "if I die." It gives me a little new hope that maybe I won't ever die.

Thanks for reminding me how old I am and what a Mess I really ought to simplify and maybe decontaminate or render more Planet-Friendly.

Driving the stuff through any/either border is a Real Bad Idea. About ten years ago a truckload of "pre-owned" steel pipe tried to enter the USA from Mexico. It was destined to be a new recreation yard in a USA public school. The kids never got the chance to climb on that special jungle gym.

ALL the Red Lights and Alarms started flashing. Assume your border crossing is equipped with radiation monitors as this US border crossing had been. At the very least, a few weeks of your Golden Years will be spent in government offices explaining your wonderful collection to various federal officials.

But in Mexico if you get jammed up, a generous donation to the local law enforcement fund will usually get you sped on your way. Never drive on highways at night. Leave A Comment if you know why.

Central American countries use a phrase "... like a Swiss tourist ..." to suggest that a good strategy is to act convincingly like someone from far away whose strange behavior is just the misunderstandings of a lost and ignorant fool in Bermuda shorts. (He actually speaks 3 languages fluently, but Español ain't one of them.)

How well the Swiss Tourist does in cases of radioactive sources I can't guess.

None of the kids wants this wonderful stuff? Are these your natural children, or from a different gene pool that lacks our interests and desires?

Massachusetts USA

P.S. I think Houdini had an arrangement with his wife that the one who went first would send back a sort of Postcard Message or Spiritual Tweet From Beyond. Also maybe a small souvenir if they have a gift shop at the entrance.


News, Global Warming, Mozart, Sports, Intergalactic Travel, sausages, VOLCANOS!!! opera, PIRATES!!! Filth in Extinct Lingos, Alternative Facts & Fake News, Big Integers & BOINC:
Remarkable Older Stuph:


08 July 2017

PIZZAQ! Before the Flying Saucer destroyed the Washington Monument and almost smooshed Little Bobby to peanut butter, how long does it take a besbol dropped from the top to hit the ground?

Click to enlarge. Flee for your life. 

I was born and grew up in Washington DC USA. One summer day I visited the Washington Monument. Suddenly with no warning an evil, hostile Flying Saucer from Outer Space smashed into the Monument, and toppled it over. Dozens of tourists were smooshed to peanut butter; I barely escaped with my life. Other Saucers destroyed the U.S. Capitol.

This really happened; it's not Fake News. Anyone who says these images are really from the movie "Earth vs. the Flying Saucers" is probably a teenager in Macedonia with a laptop. In other news from Macedonian laptops, the USA Democratic Party is keeping children as sex slaves in a popular pizza restaurant in Washington DC.

Notice the height of the Monument. Every DC kid had to memorize this height for trig and physics class. PIZZAQ! If you drop a besbol from the top of the Washington Monument, how long does it take for the besbol to hit the ground? (Naturally you do this experiment in a vacuum.) (4 slices Chicago-style pizza with extra mozarella.)

07 July 2017

PIZZAQ: I was certain I saw a UFO. We weren't stoned, even though it was northern California in 1971.

Click to enlarge.

A historical catalog of sighted varieties of Unidentified Flying Objects, mostlikely extraterrestrial (as opposed to secret Earth superpower experimental craft).

Before calling all these sightings hogwash, I testify that in 1971, driving south on the Pacific Coast highway in northern California at night with other educated adult passengers, for 45 minutes we watched an aerial object zip around the sky at huge speeds, change shape and size rapidly -- for those 45 minutes we were all convinced that whether we liked it or not, the crazy thing was an extraterrestrial UFO.

Well, it wasn't a UFO. PIZZAQ: If it wasn't from outer space, if it was an honest, natural Earth phenomenon, what was it? (Large with shallots & endives.)

04 July 2017

Foo Fighter: nice fuzzy bunny or genocidal freakazoid?

 Click to enlarge maybe. 

Plastic kit glue now contains nasty odor and you can't huff it anymore to get high or suppress appetite.

Forwarded by my old Army buddy what resideth in the USA state shaped like the palm of a right-hand mitten. This UFO has many hostile anti-Earth characteristics. Hawking says we can only guess what real aliens will be like from the only actual example of sentient life we have encountered: Us. (We drop nuclear weapons on our human neighbors, and do genocide stuff. That's our only authentic example. We ain't bunnies.)

The first UFOs human claim to have seen were called (by Allied pilots in World War 2) Foo Fighters. They'd whizz past and around and over and under our propeller planes as if we were standing still.

At bottom, a recent scrum of outer-space aliens (as opposed to illegal aliens) photographed at Ann Arbor, Michigan USA county fair.

Why do they fly 891.4 parsecs to look up our butts?

29 June 2017

How will I know in thicket ahead is danger or treasure when Body my good bright dog is dead

by May Swenson

Body my house
my horse my hound  
what will I do
when you are fallen

Where will I sleep  
How will I ride  
What will I hunt

Where can I go
without my mount  
all eager and quick  
How will I know  
in thicket ahead
is danger or treasure  
when Body my good  
bright dog is dead

How will it be
to lie in the sky
without roof or door  
and wind for an eye

With cloud for shift  
how will I hide?

May Swenson, “Question” from Nature: Poems Old and New. Copyright © 1994 by May Swenson. Reprinted with the permission of Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.
Source: Nature: Poems Old and New (Houghton Mifflin Harcourt, 1994)

15 June 2017

a bit late, but Vleeptron wishes all Ramadan Kareem

Please click to enlarge.

I ask the world to pardon me for being a week late to celebrate the holy month Ramadan.

This time it wasn't my Despair at the vile cloud of hate and violence that has darkened our human world for years. (But I certainly haven't found a cure, or a pill, for the Despair caused by this never-ending 9th Crusade.)

I'm told Roman Catholics have one Unforgiveable Sin: Despair. Because it is an insult to God to lose hope that no matter how horrible the world is, God will not help us fix it.

Much less profound. I was laid up with a minor stupid unserious disease. All I could do was shriek with pain. This dumb illness has, thankfully, subsided.

Now I can get to Vleeptron's wishes for all my neighbors on Earth for Ramadan Kareem -- a Generous month of Ramadan, in which Allah spoke the Arabic words that Muhammed wrote down as the Quran.

(No, my Arabic is almost non-existent, I read an English translation of the Quran published by Penguin -- some say it's the most read Quran translation on Earth. Vleeptron would be deeply grateful if readers -- particularly readers knowledgeable in these matters -- would comment on or critique the Penguin translation.)

Generous ... as Muslims celebrate this holy month, they take upon themselves the obligation of being generous to the poor, to those less fortunate. The greeting is simple: Ramadan Kareem. (Almost universally, the reply is a smile, a brightened face.)

Now I will stumble into controversy. My ignorant controversy, but at least I will try to keep it as short as I can.

Some of the Earth Cloud of Hate and Violence can be traced to hostility between the two main branches of Islam, Shia and Sunni. Historically this ancient hostility dates to disagreement over which of the religious leaders who followed Muhammed now preach the true Islam.

I note only the tens of thousands of men, children, women who have been killed and wounded over this difference. I pray somehow Shia and Sunni will follow Islam exclusively in neighborly peace and cooperation.

(Comments also welcome.)

For the first time in memory, Shia pilgrims celebrating Ramadan in Tehran -- Iran is the great world advocate of Shia -- were attacked and murdered. The suspects are Sunni terrorists.

I will go out on a theological limb here and declare: This is not the way to observe Ramadan.

Starting with 2 USA and NATO coalition wars, the 9th Crusade -- well, we try not to flash it all the time in big red neon, but these are the longest wars the USA has ever fought. Syria, Libya, Somalia, Afghanistan, Iraq, Yemen. I see no chance of the Long Wars ending or being politically or diplomatically settled. War without end, Amen.

Perhaps some reader can comment about a God who wants to be worshipped by never-ending wars, terror attacks, poison gas, barrel bombs. There might even be a big Greek word for this kind of God.

Dear readers, friends, neighbors -- Ramadan Kareem! At month's end, there will be great feasts and lots of candies and sweets. Worry, fear, grief will vanish, and then, in a decade or two, will fade and start to be forgotten. 

What do you remember about the Spanish-American War? Well, someday in the future, dream of a world that has forgotten today's long wars that were fought in God's name.

Vleeptron particularly wishes Ramadan Kareem to a brilliant and spiritually powerful friend, known to millions on the Internet, who is of Syrian and Palestinian ancestry. I wish all the torments of his family's land to cease -- without violence. (And I wish he could help me fix my mIRC, I downloaded the newest version and haven't been able to get back into IRC.)

25 April 2017

midnight appointment at Bahnhof Zoo / Top 5 Ways I grudgingly agree to die or perish / My Robot has no Soul

Fresh off the fire. Cheap. 

Professor Abel --

At school I studied Latin, so I could talk to Dead People and the Pope. I am good with languages, but I speak only the dialect eisenbahnwurstdeutsche. (This is sufficient for me to have many wonderful times in DE.)

Aber bitte was ist

Du bist der geliebte Mensch.

My dim acquaintance with deutsches, and my Robot, say:

You are the beloved person

... but my Robot has neither poetry nor familiarity with human meaning and social nuance.I am a Failed Poet, so I would say

You are beloved


You're a beloved guy

or maybe someone is trying to say

I like you a lot

But under what circumstances does a real deutschespracher say this? Is it an informal or sidewalk greeting, or is it a deeply felt expression of great love for the person to whom you say this?

Or is it famous from Literatur? If so, who wrote it?

Thank you for any nuance or context you can supply. My geliebte (danke fur diese Werde) Internet Relay Chat is kaput for the last year, IRC is where I go to ask Indo-European or Finno-Ugrik questions of nuance and context. You can get Icelandic questions answered in a minute on IRC, also Suomi is no problem.
In Berlin I make midnight pilgrimages to Bahnhof Zoo, they got hot Wurst, all varieties, 24/7. If we must all die, this is one of my Top 5 ways to go, I shall have died eating hot Wurst at Berlin Bahnhof Zoo at midnight. (Another on Top List is same sort of death, but at Plaza Garibaldi's 200 family food stalls in Mexico City -- also 24/7, free bonus mariachi bands.)
I am an amateur lurker on Coq-Club.


Bob Merkin

Chesterfield Massachusetts USA

P.S. The Wassa -- unglaublich!

P.P.S. This is NOT a job inquiry -- but I can fantasize about being a CS lecturer for a few years in Gothenburg, where is the harm? Do you know what Queen Christina did to Descartes in Stokholm in February at 04:00 every morning? (Later she said she was sorry.)

----- Original Message -----
From: "Andreas Abel" <>
To: "coq-club" <>
Sent: Tuesday, April 25, 2017 8:43 AM
Subject: [Coq-Club] Senior Lectureships in Computer Science at Chalmers and Gothenburg U

> We are hiring full-time permanent lecturers!
> The positions are focusing on teaching, but some time will be available
> for research as well.
> Excerpt from the description:
>   Major responsibilities
>   The scientific area is Computer Science, interpreted broadly. The
> position is a full-time tenured appointment with focus on education and
> pedagogical development.
>   You will teach a variety of topics in Computer Science; there may
> include courses such as programming, data structures, algorithms and
> databases. You will also supervise bachelor level projects and master’s
> theses. Besides teaching, you will keep up with the technical and
> pedagogical development in the areas of the position and introduce new
> methods in the curriculum.
>   As a faculty member you will share the responsibility of the
> administration and management of the department and the educational
> programmes.
>   You will collaborate with industrial, academic or governmental
> partners, and take part in the research conducted at the department. In
> addition, you are encouraged to apply for funding of further pedagogical
> advancement of our programmes, and for research funding.
> --
> Andreas Abel  <><      Du bist der geliebte Mensch.
> Department of Computer Science and Engineering
> Chalmers and Gothenburg University, Sweden