my town had an open-all-nite copy shop, and I would sleaze in there at 02:00 and spend hours making this stuff. (The copy shop liberally supplied paste and scissors and paper slicers and double-side sticky tape and White-Out. The staff had Other Things To Do and paid no attention to me whatever. I could have made kidnapping ransom notes in the nude for all they cared, I could have cranked out US paper currency as long as I paid for my copies. This all-night copy shop was a Free Environment like us Artists like.)
This is Art -- probably the first Visual Art I ever made. (I had been prohibited from ever again trying to make visual art by my public school art teachers, who believed I was Visually and Chromatically and Æsthetically Deranged. My vision tested fine, but all my art teachers believed there was Something Wrong after the images of the world I saw passed into my Brain. I remember being screamed at for painting a goat purple.)
These links must all be dead by now, and I don't know if they ever caught Roderick Neal Hotham. When I first posted this on "Elmer Elevator's Discount Prep," a very angry lady wrote me an e-mail. She cursed me for defaming a wonderful and completely innocent man.
If you want to curse me, or if you know what happened to Roderick Neal Hotham, Leave A Comment.
If you think my Visual Art sucks, stand in line behind all my Art Teachers, who by now are eternally burning in the fires of Hell.
The Cowboy and the Dutch
A Cowboy from Niagara
Falls is highly popular and admired but lonely. At the same time, a
Dutch Tulip-Seller Girl, so recently arrived in St. Louis, Missouri
that she has not yet had time to acquire local clothes or shoes, is lonely.
Each decides to take a vacation and fly to Paris. Paris, city of
innocent gaiety and mirth, where half-clad women dance, show their derrieres
to tourists, leapfrog over Japanese businessmen, and lounge around
in their lingerie smoking and occasionally thinking about Abraham Lincoln.
There the Cowboy and the Tulip Girl meet and fall in love.
Meanwhile, fugitive embezzler Roderick
Neal Hotham has also fled to Paris, where he is hatching an evil
new scheme involving the unwitting young lovers. He spies on them through
the window of a restaurant where they are dining with another cleancut
American couple. Because they are in Paris and think it's the local custom,
they all commence une menage a quatre. Across town, two young nude
women who live with kangaroos practice boxing and calisthenics
in their atelier.
September 1995 / from Dover Clip Art
("Naughty French Illustrations," "Travel") and the Post
Copyright © 2015 by Robert B. Merkin, All Rights Reserved