Another two bite the dust. Agence-Vleeptron Presse is sad to say goodbye to the possibility of President John Edwards, because he had the finest hair and teeth of all -- better even than Mitt Romney's hair and teeth. Edwards spends more on his hair and teeth every year than I spend to keep my truck on the road, including insurance.I don't remember a goddam thing he claims to have stood for. Utterly nothing about his candidacy was unique or interesting. The man was a Smiling Coma, his candidacy a Sleep Aid. If he had a vision for a better America -- or a worse America -- I sure never saw a glimpse of it. Not a single phrase he uttered was memorable. We were asked to vote for a Great Smile, an Eye Twinkle, and the Best Haircut in American politics.
Of course he was not unique in being an entirely superficial candidate; on the Republican side, Fred Thompson thrilled several people briefly with his folksy I'm-Sorta-Like-Ronald-Reagan TV actor avuncular face. He also stood for totally nothing that I can recall.
Bill Richardson has also dropped out of the race, and has yet to indicate which of the remaining Democratic candidates he'll support. (Half the Kennedy family just group-endorsed Obama.) Richardson may just possibly be the only presidential candidate, or president, in the last twenty years to speak another language (Spanish) fluently. In such a bunch, that makes him a regular Rocket Scientist by comparison. Imagine a president who could conduct diplomacy with Mexico without a translator -- boggles the mind.
Well, these are all that's left of the potential babysitters who'd be willing to be alone for two hours with your precious little child. See anyone you'd be willing to phone? He or she will zip right over.
Do I want this person to babysit my daughter/son/grandchild for two hours?
YES NO
[ ] [ ] John McCain
[ ] [ ] Hillary Rodham Clinton
[ ] [ ] Ron Paul
[ ] [ ] Barack Obama
[ ] [ ] Mitt Romney
[ ] [ ] Mike Huckabee
[ ] [ ] Michael Bloomberg (photo not shown)
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