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30 March 2008

ground zero / suddenly later this summer / safe as milk

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Have you heard?
It's in the stars
Next July we collide with Mars!
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is

-- "Well, Did You Evah?" Cole Porter

Doesn't matter where you are
when the shit hits the fan sometime this summer. The entire Planet Earth will be swallowed up by the Black Hole which CERN's Large Hadron Collider (LHC) will create when it starts up for the first time.

But it's going to start a few kliks west of Geneva, Switzerland. And then grow, annihilating everything it encounters.

Also this is where the CERN Open House on Sunday 6 April will have Nobel Prize physicists explaining to the public that there is just a very tiny chance that The World Will End when LHC cranks up. Probably no Black Hole. Nothing to worry about, probably. Safe as milk.

3 comments:

Abbas said...

quite looking forward to it. take your protein pills and put your helmet on.

Vleeptron Dude said...

I don't even know if I feel like doing my taxes. I mean, what's the point? Particularly if my government is taking my money and sending it to Europeans to HELP bring about TEOTW in a few months.

This is the moment to finally take up bungee jumping and parachuting.

Just goes to show how pathetic our powers of Prophesy are. I could imagine 25 places where TEOTW might begin. 25 places just notorious for -- metaphorically speaking -- all sorts of careless teenage smoking around fireworks and gasoline.

But GENEVA?? We're all going to be swallowed up and destroyed because of stuff geniuses are about to do in GENEVA??

abbas said...

by the way, this was all bullshit. see my blog for details.