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24 January 2007

educational standards

This is probably very Googlable, so Vleeptron isn't giving away any Pizza, but who said these things? (Helps if you're in the UK.)

* "Where is East Angular, is it abroad?"

* "Rio de Janeiro -- that's a person"

* "The Daily Mail is the post"

* "Saddam Hussein -- that's a boxer"

* "A ferret is a bird"

* "I had my first birthday when I was one"

* "Who is heinzstein?"

* "Mother Theresa is from Germany"

* "Sherlock Holmes invented toilets"

* "The Union Jack is for all of us, but the St. George is just for London, isn't it?"

* "I knew Lynne was from Aberdeen, but I didn't realise Aberdeen was in Scotland"

* "What's a sparagus? Do you grow it?"

* "I am intelligent, but I let myself down because I can't speak properly or spell"

* about peacocks: "You see those things... don't think I'm being daft... but them things that look like eyes, are they their real eyes?"

* "Jonny, I'm not being tictactical in here"

* "They were trying to use me as an escape goat"

* "Do they speak Portuganese in Portugal? I thought Portugal was in Spain"

* "That's asexual harassment"

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi!

I'm Narges from Livinginiran in Livejournal. It's good to hear a journalist's view on Saddam's execution. It was really enlightening! Really!

Oh I didn't know that execution not for Lawful Punishment, but for the nastiest and most mean-spirited of ethnic and religious Revenge happens in Texas and Florida too! That's surely something to have several world discussions about!

Anyway, thanks for leaving that comment! Knowing that another person from over the world has read my blog is SO encouraging. Not because I think my blog is worth anything (because I know it isn't!!). The communication is all that matters to me!

Very very good luck!

Anonymous said...

sounds very steven wright'ish.

Vleeptron Dude said...

well if Stephen Wright had said these things, he would have been joking and trying to make people laugh

this person -- a person who in recent times has become famous in the UK, and in recent weeks has become Very Very Very Famous -- is not a comedian and was probably not trying to make people laugh. (it just turned out that way)

Anonymous said...

I was tempted to say Prince Phillip, but he's not that eloquent or restrained, so I'm going to have to go with Jade Goody from Big Brother.

(On another note, I'm looking over 1984 and realizing that George was probably most ironically wrong about the Inner Party: he thought it'd be dominated by Irishmen, with names like O'Brien. Turns out it's dominated by a guy named Blair.)

Vleeptron Dude said...

You got it! It's Jade Goody!!!

(She just took a trip to India, I think. That must have been odd. For India.)

Of course Gracie Allen made a whole comedy career out of saying really stupid things like this. So the big question is: Can a human being *really* be this stupid, or are these things just part of the act which has made Jade so famous? Does she know that people wouldn't be so interested in her if they thought she had a brain?

The new movie "The Queen" about Queen Elizabeth II begins with a chat between her and her chief of household about the new Prime Minister whom she'll be meeting for the first time later that day. They don't talk about his ethnicity specifically, but they do talk about his family and his social and economic background.

You could get the same facts from Wikipedia, but this is interesting because you see which parts of his background raise which of the Queen's eyebrows and generate which brow furrow.

Oh dear, you live close to me, I might actually have to buy you pizza.