educational standards

This is probably very Googlable, so Vleeptron isn't giving away any Pizza, but who said these things? (Helps if you're in the UK.)

* "Where is East Angular, is it abroad?"

* "Rio de Janeiro -- that's a person"

* "The Daily Mail is the post"

* "Saddam Hussein -- that's a boxer"

* "A ferret is a bird"

* "I had my first birthday when I was one"

* "Who is heinzstein?"

* "Mother Theresa is from Germany"

* "Sherlock Holmes invented toilets"

* "The Union Jack is for all of us, but the St. George is just for London, isn't it?"

* "I knew Lynne was from Aberdeen, but I didn't realise Aberdeen was in Scotland"

* "What's a sparagus? Do you grow it?"

* "I am intelligent, but I let myself down because I can't speak properly or spell"

* about peacocks: "You see those things... don't think I'm being daft... but them things that look like eyes, are they their real eyes?"

* "Jonny, I'm not being tictactical in here"

* "They were trying to use me as an escape goat"

* "Do they speak Portuganese in Portugal? I thought Portugal was in Spain"

* "That's asexual harassment"