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09 December 2006

New York Post's front page, Thursday 7 December 06

The New York Post -- get ready for a shock -- is owned by Rupert Murdoch.

A few years ago, some media critic dubbed The Post "scratch and sniff journalism."

If The New York Times is aimed at an average reader with 2+ years of college, The New York Post is aimed at an average reader who didn't quite snag that high school diploma.

Trouble reading big words, mostly, trouble with math, trouble with history, poor impulse control ...

Well, whatever The New York Post is, this is its front page Thursday [7 December 2006], its reaction to the release of the report of the Iraq study commission headed by former Treasury Secretary James Baker (the monkey on the left) and former Congressman Lee Hamilton.

This front page has, astonishingly, grabbed all the reaction attention in the U.S. media -- as if it were some sort of news or political statement by itself, comparable in significance to the Baker-Hamilton report.

Well, it is news. And so are the recent photos of Britney Spears running around in a miniskirt without panties.

I have no snooty right to say "This isn't news."

Britney Spears without panties is news. And so is The New York Post's front page about the Baker-Hamilton report.

Should America surrender in Iraq?

Certainly not.

We should just get all our troops the fuck out of there as soon as humanly possible, before 3000 more of our neighbors' children are killed for nothing.

When they're all home safe, then we can call the whole Iraq thing Victory and throw a big parade.

Apparently what The Post and thinkers like The Post believe America should do is redouble our efforts to commit some sort of drunken blundering never-ending military suicide -- the word "Vietnam" keeps coming to mind -- indefinitely, and Good Things will happen for America.

I stopped taking LSD decades ago. Now I know who's been taking it since I stopped. Bush. Murdoch. Rumsfeld. Kerry. McCain. Limbaugh.

The Baker-Hamilton Commission was supposed to be a last-ditch possibility that the Bush administration, with its commander-in-chief powers, might sober up and come to its senses about the catastrophe Bush flung America into. Baker and Hamilton aren't exactly radical left-wing anarchist pacifist Quaker hippies.

It's pretty clear Bush will never take anybody's good advice if it points toward ending this war.

He won't suffer. As his constitutional time winds down, Bush will concentrate on raising money for his presidential library.

Our soldiers and Marines will suffer, be maimed, and die. A huge bloc of Asia will be destabilized and will overflow with violence and refugees for decades -- just as Southeast Asia is only now recovering from the massive destabilization our Vietnam War left behind.

Vleeptron has previously run a post about whom Bush does take war advice from: God. According to several political figures he met in the Middle East, Bush claims God directly commanded him to overthrow Sadaam Hussein.

Well, yes, I have to admit, God trumps Baker, Hamilton and their commission of elder statespersons. No wonder he's not listening to them.

Call me when this Bad Trip is over. The results of the November election were a sort of political Intervention -- Congress and Bush couldn't stop themselves, so the voters fired a bunch of Republicans and flipped control of both houses of Congress.

Call me when a sufficient number of these psychos are finally in Rehab. Washington's addiction to continuing this war, Washington's inability to even consider tapering off or ending military operations in Iraq -- this is foreign policy by Mel Gibson in a sports car careening down the highway after half a bottle of tequila.


Jim Olson said...

Oh, and screw the Post. When journalists make news, they completely obliterate any credibility they may once have had. The Post isn't worth putting in the cat box. Neither is the Herald, printed here in Boston.

Bob Merkin said...

people who need doctored monkey cartoons (previously a Post front page showed France and Germany's UN ambassadors with weasel heads) and have a lot of trouble reading big words need a daily newspaper, too. And they get what they need: The NY Post and The Boston Herald.

Jim Olson said...

exactly. are we going to see you in St. Botolph's Town next week-end?

Bob Merkin said...

no guarantees, tho i good Xmas concert in Boston's tempting.

i'd forgotten that Boston was originally called St. Botolph's.

St. Botolph's is the name of the town all the Wapshot family is from in "The Wapshot Chronicles" and "The Wapshot Scandals" by John Cheever, a saga about Yankees (coastal Connecticut) I very highly recomend.

Jim Olson said...

Indeed. Boston, England in Lincolnshire...the local church is St. Botolphs...ergo, St. Botolphs Town, Botolph's Town, Bo's Town, Boston.

Jim Olson said...

Oh, forgot to mention...several of the original Mayflower passengers had been baptised at St. Botolphs.