Campaign 2008 -- another one bites the dust & ascendeth to Heaven -- leaving fewer babysitters to pick to be alone with your kid

Click, yeah, that might show what's going on here.

Agence-Vleeptron Presse sincerely apologizes for calling Cable News Network "unspeakable cocksockers." The word is spelled "cocksuckers."

I sincerely hope no one looks at A-VP's series of Babysitter Poll graphics and perceives little hints that suggest A-VP is not perfectly fair and balanced and objective about the candidates running for president of the United States. Just because one guy who dropped out is depicted as swirling down the toilet bowl, while Dennis Kucinich has an iconic halo and is ascending to Heaven, doesn't mean we're playing favorites.

Those unspeakable cocksuckers at Cable News Network refused to let Kucinich participate in the debate they sponsored for Democratic candidates in South Carolina. Consequently the American people were not allowed to hear from any candidate who advocates Single-Payer Universal Health Care for all Americans regardless of their ability to pay for Health, Medicine and Life. All the candidates who were allowed to debate are total blowjob whores for the private health insurance industry.

Kucinich, and Ron Paul -- who's still hangin' in there (he's got a very healthy money chest, but all from individual voters, not a penny from corporations or lobbyists) -- were also promising an immediate end to the Iraq War.

These people are dangerous un-American radicals and Fox and CNN are protecting the American voters from hearing their strange, suspicious ideas. Please send an e-mail to Fox and CNN to tell them how appreciative and grateful you are that they're protecting naive dopes like us from these dangerous, different ideas.

So these are the remaining candidates. Still no photo of Bloomberg, because he's still gazing at himself in the mirror and wondering whether or not to buy the White House. It must be difficult to hear himself think what with the huge mob outside his window screaming for him to run for president.

Anyway, the Babysitter Poll is still running. An emergency's come up and you need to find a babysitter to be alone with your adorable little child for two hours. See anybody you'd feel comfortable with here? Let Agence-Vleeptron Presse know your thoughts.